


if you don't mind being patient with my fumbling around

by ninepointeight



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Flirting, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Friends to Lovers, Humor, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, Sexual Tension, Slice of Life, Tooth-Rotting Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-30
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-09-30 09:49:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,157
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17221667
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ninepointeight/pseuds/ninepointeight
Summary: “I couldn’t help it!” Sehun exclaims, because he really couldn’t. How could he have, when Jongdae had been right there, with his pretty mascara-free lashes and unbelievably chiseled cheekbones? “He’s too pretty!”Jongin makes another face at him, “If you have a crush on Jongdae hyung then just confess or something, why are you tellingme?”





	if you don't mind being patient with my fumbling around

**Author's Note:**

> this is like 5000 words longer than i was planning bc it's literally all self-indulgent fluff lol

“Hey,” Sehun says, breaking the comfortable silence in their little corner of the waiting room.

It’s about T minus 15 minutes until they have to go onstage for their first concert since July, and certain members (Joonmyun) are already giddy and literally hopping with nerves. Some are also studying themselves in the mirror, rehearsing their lines for the ment and looking for the most flattering angle to laugh in. (Joonmyun, again.)

Jongin, on the other hand, doesn’t even bother to look up from his phone screen.

“What,” he just grunts.

Sehun doesn’t really mind, though, and instead stares for another moment at where the main vocals are warming up together by singing some warped rendition of Miracles in December.

But that isn’t the point; Sehun twists to face Jongin. He leans forward, brows furrowed and face serious–

“Don’t you think Jongdae hyung is really pretty?” 

This, apparently, is unexpected enough that Jongin actually looks up this time, abandoning his phone game in favor of looking at Sehun.

“Well,” he says, after a second, “We’re all pretty hot…?”

Sehun makes a noise at the back of his throat. That isn’t what he meant, “That isn’t what I meant.”

Jongin quirks his eyebrows, “What did you mean, then?”

Sehun’s eyes immediately flit back over to where Kyungsoo is trying to give Baekhyun a noogie, the latter wailing dramatically, while Jongdae sits at the side and watches them fondly, lips curled up at the corners.

“It’s just Jongdae hyung is so,” Sehun tries and fails to come up with a more comprehensive word, “He’s so _pretty,_ you know? His eyelashes are so long,” he says, “And he isn’t even wearing mascara.”

Jongin’s face is somewhere between confused and endlessly entertained when Sehun turns back to face him. He opens his mouth to say something, but he looks like he doesn’t quite know where to start.

“How do you know he isn’t wearing mascara?” He eventually asks.

Sehun clicks his tongue. What an amateur question. “I was staring at him the entire time in the dressing room, obviously,” he replies, “And the coordi noona definitely didn’t use any on him.”

Jongin scrunches his nose. “You were ‘ _staring at him the_ _entire time’_? _”_ He repeats, “That’s kind of weird, man.”

“I couldn’t help it!” Sehun insists, because he really couldn’t. How could he have, when Jongdae had been right there, with his pretty mascara-free lashes and unbelievably chiseled cheekbones? “He’s too pretty!”

Jongin makes another face at him, “If you have a crush on Jongdae hyung then just confess or something, why are you telling _me?”_

Sehun chokes. “I do _not_ have a crush on him,” he splutters, but Jongin just looks at him, unimpressed. “I’m serious,” he tries again, “I just appreciate beauty when I see it. That makes me an _artiste,_ not some loser with a crush.”

Jongin’s responding eye roll is epic. He pointedly looks back down at his phone, “Ugh, I can’t believe you made me lose my last life on Candy Crush just to listen to you thirst over Jongdae hyung’s eyelashes,” Jongin grumbles, “Fucking asshole.”

Sehun is about to flip him off, but is distracted before he can follow through– because on the other side of the room, Jongdae has started to sing softly, eyes closed and head tipped back on his chair, one earphone plugged in. 

Somewhere in the back of his mind Sehun is aware that he's starting to smile like an idiot, but he can’t help it.

After all, he likes Jongdae’s voice even more than he likes his eyelashes.

 

*

 

They’re on their third day of the Tokyo Dome tour, and Sehun has missed this so much– dancing, performing, seeing their beloved aeris in person. It also certainly doesn’t hurt when Kyungsoo’s voice cracks in the middle of a note during Lady Luck, and Sehun snickers into his palm along with the rest of the stadium. Everything is going smoothly, or, well, as smoothly as anything involving Byun Baekhyun can go, when the thought hits Sehun again, but this time harder, and more tangible–

Jongdae is breathtakingly, painfully pretty.

They’re still wearing their dumb acoustic stage get-ups, white shirt and white pants and white socks and white shoes, and not for the first time Sehun wonders whose idea this was. Jongin always tells him that he looks like a piece of paper in this outfit because of how pale he is, and for once he is inclined to agree. It really isn’t his best look.

Jongdae, on the other hand, manages to pull it off perfectly. (But, to be fair, what can he _not_ pull off?) Sehun stares at the side of Jongdae’s face as he smiles warmly at the crowd, and he thinks he finally understands why their fans always lose their shit over Kim ‘Perfect Boyfriend’ Jongdae.                                                                       

The thought makes him feel a sudden, overwhelming sense of possessiveness that he knows is unreasonable, but can’t be bothered to tamp down on. He doesn’t know where it’s coming from, but at least it offers an explanation for why his legs are suddenly moving on their own accord, taking large strides toward where Jongdae is belting his beautiful heart out to the cameraman.

And before Sehun knows it, he is already there, chest pressing against Jongdae’s back and arms wrapping around his waist, chin tucked against his shoulder.

If Jongdae is surprised by the sudden contact, he doesn’t show it. He just laughs, patting one of Sehun’s hands lightly before he continues singing. The fans start going crazy, and, right, they’re probably on the jumbotron right now. One of the girls at a nearby stand is screaming so much that Sehun is actually worried she may pass out from lack of oxygen, while a countless number of cellphones are pointed at them, probably all recording.

 _Good,_ Sehun finds himself thinking, with an acerbity that surprises even himself as his arms tighten around Jongdae’s waist, _I hope they post it everywhere on Naver, too, so everybody will see that hyung is mine._

It must be written all over his face, because from the corner of his eye he can see Jongin rolling his eyes again, while Baekhyun is grinning in a way so that Sehun knows he’ll definitely be getting shit about this.

And, never one to disappoint, after the concert ends and as they file into the van (Sehun elbows Chanyeol out of the way to get the seat next to Jongdae), Baekhyun is the first to say something.

“So, Sehunnie,” he twists around in his seat to waggle his eyebrows at Sehun, “Wanna tell us what that was all about?” 

Even though he had been expecting this, Sehun still can’t stop himself from flushing, if only just a little bit. It makes Chanyeol start ‘oooooh’-ing obnoxiously. Sehun clears his throat, “It was nothing,” he says, and carefully does not look at Jongdae, “Hyung is just…amazing, when he sings.”

He sinks a bit further into his seat when Baekhyun coughs out a loud ‘whipped.’ It’s embarrassing enough as it is, Sehun thinks, he really doesn’t need Baekhyun screaming it from the rooftops, when he feels a nudge at his side. He turns, only to find Jongdae smiling fondly at him.

“Thanks, Sehunnie,” he says. His eyes are crinkled cutely at the corners. He is speaking much more quietly than Baekhyun’s dramatic solo reenactment of some Shakespearean romance (in which Sehun is Romeo and Jongdae is his Juliet), or Jongin’s stupid high-pitched laugh in the background, but Sehun still hears him loud and clear. “I think you’re amazing, too.”

And what can Sehun do, except for smile back, and fall just that much deeper.

 

*

 

Sehun loves their fans. He really does. He loves Exo-L’s with all of his heart. He loves being able to see them, to talk to them, to perform for them.

He still remembers this one time, back in 2013 when they had first truly started to blow up, where they were doing their usual post-show routine outside of the concert venue. He had wanted nothing more than to shower and then sleep for an entire year, and at that point he was just going through the motions purely based on muscle memory and leftover adrenaline from the concert– smile, wave, sign an autograph, shake someone’s hand, repeat.

It hadn’t been anything different from usual, but as he was nearing the end of the red carpet, a girl nearby grabbed his hand. This wasn’t exactly uncommon, but her grip was hard and forceful, almost bruising. Sehun had turned, about to politely shake her off, but before he could say anything she had taken one look at his face, and promptly _lost it_ right there.

She was short and small and skinny, squished between about a million and one other people, arm still stretched over the metal barriers, and fucking bawling her eyes out.

“I’m– I’m so happy, that I got to see you,” she had choked out between sobs, while Sehun just stood there not knowing what to do like a dumbass, “I love you so much, thank you for being you.”

He remembers thinking that the line was corny, but more importantly he remembers feeling touched, and shaken. He never thought that him simply existing, simply _being_ there could mean so much to someone. He had only managed to get out a lame “Thank you, too” before the girl was nudged out of the way, and three more screaming teenagers took her place.

But seeing her that day, it seems monumental, now. Because it reminds him– that he does this for the fans. The fans who continue to support them despite everything, the fans who love them so much they could burst into tears from just one look.

And yet, with all that being said– Sehun still can’t stop himself from being bored out of his mind right now.

They are in the middle of a classic fan meeting game, where they’re given an adjective and have to write down which member they think it applies to the most. Variety actually used to be one of Sehun’s favourite things about being an idol, once upon a time, but it's hard for the questions not to get repetitive after being in the business for six years and counting.

He shifts uncomfortably in his chair; the stadium they’re in is the kind where the seats form a circle around the stage like some weird cult, and the overhead lights are far too bright. Meanwhile, Joonmyun is taking his sweet time recounting an anecdote that Sehun has definitely heard before.

He can’t help but tune it out, and instead starts to mindlessly doodle a picture of Chanyeol on the small whiteboard the production team had given them earlier to write on. He is just putting the finishing touches on Chanyeol's extra pointy and big ears, when Joonmyun finally wraps up his story; it must have been the one about hearing Kyungsoo sing in the shower, because he looks even more pissed off than usual when Sehun looks up at him.

“Alright, let’s move on!” Their host for the day says, voice bright, from the front of the stage, gesticulating wildly with his arms and changing the subject before Kyungsoo can strangle anyone. He’s loud, dramatic in the way that Japanese entertainers tend to be, “The next word is,” he says, pauses theatrically, “ _Cute.”_

Sehun doesn’t know why, but the crowd immediately _ahhhh_ -s in unison. He turns back to his whiteboard, and erases Chanyeol’s face, starting with the eyes.

He already knows his answer, although he taps the side of his face and pretends to think for the camera. They reveal their boards one by one this time, and he waits patiently for the fans to finish screaming when Kyungsoo chooses Jongin, until finally the host is waving his arm and gesturing emphatically in Sehun’s direction.

He makes a big show out of flipping his whiteboard around, grinning when it predictably makes the audience giggle, while the other members groan in dismay.

“Sehun-san chooses…” The host says, eyes wide, “ _Himself!”_

Sehun grins at the camera. “There’s no one cuter than me.” He says cheekily, making the fans squeal again, while Baekhyun makes gagging noises into his microphone.

“Yah, Oh Sehun, you are just...” Joonmyun says with an exaggerated shake of his head, making the audience laugh, but that is about the extent of the teasing Sehun receives.

It isn’t long before they’re moving on to the next members. Sehun half-listens to most of it, sighing along with the fangirls when Chanyeol fails to choose Baekhyun, but perks up to full attention when it gets to Jongdae’s turn.

“Saa,” the host is saying, “Chen-san. Who, in your opinion, is the cutest member in EXO?”   

Jongdae smiles ( _pretty_ , Sehun’s mind supplies) and flips his board over. On it, written in neat, bold characters, is “Sehun.”

The fangirls scream again, getting even louder when the camera pans to where Sehun is trying to hide his smile with the palm of his hand.

“ _Wow_ ,” the host says, “Chen-san, why did you pick Sehun-san?”

Jongdae hugs the whiteboard to his chest cutely. “Well,” he says, “Sehunnie doesn’t look like it, but he’s actually an aegyo master! I can never say no to him when he’s being so cute.”

Sehun’s smile grows impossibly bigger, until his cheeks start to hurt.

The host makes an exaggerated noise of understanding. “ _Ahhhh_ ,” he says, “I see, that’s some awfully high praise,” he turns to Sehun, who is smiling dopily to himself, still feeling disproportionately happy from the compliment.

And then– like dumping a bucket of cold water on his head –the host smiles sweetly at Sehun, and says:

“Now how about we get a firsthand demonstration from the ‘aegyo master’?”

Sehun’s smile freezes on his face, and he’s pretty sure he just heard the sound of something breaking deep inside of him. His sanity, probably.

Nobody _ever_ wants to do aegyo. They usually decide who the victim will be before shows through rock paper scissors tournaments, and Sehun very much remembers Kyungsoo losing earlier (which may also help explain why he looks exceptionally murderous today). He can’t believe he just got thrown under the bus like that, although at least it was by Jongdae, and not Baekhyun or something.  

Still, Sehun can already hear Jongin laughing at him somewhere on the other side of the stage, while Baekhyun and Chanyeol ‘ _come onnnnn’_ loudly into their microphones. Even looking at Jongdae’s beautiful face doesn’t make Sehun feel (that much) better.

He takes a deep breath, glancing warily at the camera in front of his face.

Fuck, whatever. Here he goes.

 

* 

 

Sehun wants to become a farmer.

No, really, he does. It would be nice, he thinks, him and Kyungsoo could rent a nice little cottage in the countryside together and tend to their organic tomato garden, and Sehun would become so immersed in the lifestyle that he would eventually cut off all contact with the outside world, thus never having to think about the disaster that had promptly followed his cringeworthy aegyo at the fan meeting yesterday again.

The short version of what happened is that– yep, you guessed it– Sehun embarrasses himself. Enormously.

And the long, infinitely more confusing version is this.

Sehun does the typical ‘buing buing’ thing, thinking that he can’t go wrong with the classics. But of course Byun fucking Baekhyun takes one look at him and scoffs, loudly, “Where’s your originality?” This, in one convoluted way or another, leads to practically the entire stadium chanting for Jongdae to step in and show them what “ _real_ aegyo” is all about.

And here’s where it all starts to go wrong. Jongdae, for whatever reason, takes it as instigation to show _Sehun_ what real aegyo is all about, and swivels his chair around so that they’re facing each other.

Just his face by itself is offensively cute enough, Sehun thinks, but then Jongdae does this, this _thing_ with it– juts his lower lip out a little, furrows his trademark 180-degree brows, widens his eyes– and then it’s just _deadly._

A few strands of hair fall softly across his forehead, and Jongdae hunches his shoulders in, looking up at Sehun through a curtain of thick lashes.

“Sehunnie~” He whines, as his eyes seem to get even bigger.

And– yeah.

Sehun is done for; he’s pretty sure he legitimately swoons.

All he wants to do is to lean forward and wrap his arms around Jongdae, let him bury his face in Sehun’s chest, feed him waffles, and maybe even make out a little. Cuddle, too, definitely. 

It's just that, Sehun obviously can’t actually do any of those things. So he naturally opts for the next best option instead.

He falls off his chair.                                                                                           

There isn’t really much else to it. One second he’s still in his seat, and the next he’s barely catching himself from faceplanting on the shiny marble floor.

There is the initial moment of shock, a heartfelt thought of _holy shit I’m pretty sure I almost just died_ , before what just happened seems to really register.

He just fell off his fucking chair. In front of a stadium filled with 20,000 people, and approximately 30 cameras pointed at his face.

Sehun rolls over slowly (and lamely) onto his ass. He finally musters the courage to raise his head, and predictably, the first thing he sees is Jongdae, who looks about three seconds from bursting into uncontrollable laughter. He looks like he is bursting at the seams trying to hold it in, and Sehun is grateful for the effort, but it all turns out to be in vain– because a split second later, Baekhyun breaks the silence with the shrillest and most ear-splitting laugh Sehun has ever heard. 

“BAHAHAHHAHAHA,” he practically screams into his mic, as Sehun’s face starts to heat up. “SEHUN JUST FELL OFF HIS FUCKING CHAIR, DID YOU GUYS SEE THAT???”

And then, as if they’re all at once assured that it is okay to laugh now (which it isn’t, at least not for Sehun’s pride), everybody– the audience, the host, the members, the staff, the fucking _security guards_ – loses it, almost simultaneously _._ Even Joonmyun is too out of breath with laughter to berate Baekhyun for swearing in front of their fans.

Sehun uses this time to pick himself off the floor, slowly and shamefacedly, and even through his chuckling the cameraman follows him closely, broadcasting what is probably the third most embarrassing moment of Sehun’s life for the entire stadium to see. 

“Sehun-san,” the host gasps when he finally catches his breath enough to get out, between peals of laughter, “Why– why, exactly, did you fall out of your _chair_?”

Sehun’s collar is starting to burn up. His skin feels like it’s overheating, and he thanks God (and the coordi noona) that his foundation will probably hide the flustered blush that has crawled up his neck in the meantime.

“I,” he tries to say, and clears his throat. “I was just surprised,” he says, a bit meekly.

“By what?” Chanyeol asks, creepily white teeth bared in a wide grin, “Jongdae’s overwhelming cuteness?”

Sehun wants to reply something snarky, like “Wow, hyung, ‘overwhelming’ is a four-syllable word, are you sure you didn’t just sprain something saying it?” But then he reminds himself that they’re in public, and that patience is a fucking virtue. Plus, it’s not like Chanyeol is one-hundred percent off-mark.

So Sehun chooses to take the high road and pretend Chanyeol doesn’t exist instead, pointedly turning his chair to face the other way. He hopes his face conveys the underlying “shut the fuck up” clearly enough.

And luckily, before any more damage can be done, the host decides to take pity on him. With one last joke that makes everyone snicker underneath their breath (except, again, for Baekhyun, who _guffaws)_ , they somewhat seamlessly transition to the next event.

The rest of the fan meet is mostly uneventful, though at one point Sehun accidentally makes eye contact with Jongade, and he is about to smile at him except Jongdae immediately looks away and starts giggling hysterically. It doesn’t take a genius to guess what he’s thinking about.

It drags on, but eventually the meeting ends. As they are bowing to the fans and thanking them for coming, all Sehun can think about is how he can’t wait to lock himself in a bathroom stall and watch fancams of himself on his phone until he feels better.

Except, of course, he has to survive backstage first– he isn’t naïve enough to think that everybody will magically forget about…the incident.

And true to form, as soon as they’ve gotten their mics taken off and are out of range of the cameras, the teasing and mockery begin, for real this time.

“Your face was literally like, ‘ _Kyaah~ Jongdae-sama, take me!’_ ” Baekhyun says, voice pitched high, and then bursts into deafening laughter. Sehun doesn’t see how it is funny, not at all, but all the other members laugh too, even Jongdae.

“Shut up,” Sehun mutters. And then, a beat too late, “Hyung _.”_

“Wow, you are such a disrespectful brat,” Baekhyun sniffs, clearly about to launch off into another long-winded spiel, purely because he loves the sound of his own voice, but he is interrupted by Manager hyung walking towards them with his phone in one hand, looking amused.

“Sehun,” he says brightly, turning his phone screen around, “Look, you’ve gone viral on Twitter!”

A clip, around 30 seconds long, is playing. It’s a little shaky, obviously taken by a fan with their phone, but clear enough to be able to see what is happening on the jumbotron. Namely, the sight of Jongdae’s fatal aegyo and Sehun’s stricken expression before he’s falling over like a baby giraffe in 720p. The caption reads “Omo!!! Sechen blessing us all [heart eye emoji][heart eye emoji].” It’s been less than an hour, but the tweet already has over a thousand likes and nearly as many retweets.

Sehun opens his mouth. “Why is this happening.” He says.

Manager hyung just smiles at him. He pats Sehun on the shoulder, “Remember, no publicity is bad publicity.”

Sehun scowls. He disagrees, this is clearly bad publicity. All his fans will think that he’s a loser and leave him. “Whatever.” He says instead.

“Aww, Sehunnie,” a melodic voice nearby interjects, and Sehun is distressed to find that just the sound of Jongdae’s voice can make his heart beat faster, as a warm weight leans against his shoulder.

“It’s okay. It was really cute!” Jongdae beams up at him. Fuck, how is he so fucking adorable, “And really flattering. But honestly I’m cringing just as hard as you at that video…I don’t know why people think I’m good at aegyo, it’s so awkward to watch." 

Sehun’s mouth drops open. “Hyung,” he says, turning so that he can put his hands on Jongdae’s shoulders. He frowns to show how serious he is, “You’re like, the cutest person _ever_. I can’t believe you’re doubting your cuteness. Stop it.”

Jongdae blinks at him for a second, looking surprised, before he breaks into a blinding smile, “Thanks, Sehunnie,” he says, rapping Sehun’s chest with his knuckles. The corners of his eyes are crinkled endearingly, “But you’re wrong. I’m not the cutest person ever,” he says, “ _You_ are.”   

Sehun can’t help but smile back, but before he can say anything Baekhyun is butting in noisily with a pointed cough.

“Ugh,” he says, sighing dramatically from his spot on the couch, “Can _some people_ go flirt somewhere else? This is a public space, you know, _some people_ could really be more considerate to their surroundings…”

Jongdae just rolls his eyes, “Shut up, Baekhyun,” he says loudly.

“Yeah, shut up, Baekhyun.” Sehun repeats.

Baekhyun gasps, scandalized. “I’m your hyung!” He wails dramatically, but it all becomes background noise as Sehun is distracted by a small crowd that has gathered nearby, around Manager hyung.

A few coordi noonas and members of their staff that were in the bathroom or on break who hadn’t been there to witness what had happened, and a few that had but just wanted to see it again, are huddled together over the small phone screen.

Even through the curtain of people, Sehun can hear the coarse quality of the audio. “Sehunnie~” the Jongdae onscreen says, while the real one standing next to him grimaces in embarrassment. Sehun wants to laugh, but then there is the sound of a loud clatter, followed by the distinct noise of him falling out of his chair.

The grainy buzz of the fans’ laughter blends smoothly with basically everybody in the room cracking up all at once, just from the sound and imagery alone.

Even Jongin, who is all the way on the other side of the room, is doubled over in his chair hysterically. The coordi noona standing next to him giggles along, the makeup wipe in her hand long forgotten.

Chanyeol’s booming voice isn’t difficult to pick out, “Haha, Sehunnie, you’re so fucking stupid!”

Jongdae visibly holds in a laugh. “Shut up, Chanyeol,” he says.

Sehun sighs. Chanyeol and Jongin’s respectively low and high pitched laughter mix in the air to form some horrible symphony that makes him want to die.

“Yeah,” he says, defeated, as Chanyeol continues to laugh. “Shut up, Chanyeol.”

  

*

  

It isn’t hard to notice that something is off in the following weeks. Which makes sense, since the only one out of them who is capable of being subtle is Kyungsoo, and he would never sink so low as to participate in something as ridiculous as this, let alone initiate it.  

It– as in, the other members are trying to _matchmake_ them.

Not only that, but they’re doing a terrible job at it. For example, they were all drinking together the other night when Baekhyun loudly insisted on a game of Seven Minutes in Heaven (Sehun doesn’t even know what to say about this one), except before anything could happen Chanyeol somehow managed to break approximately thirty different plates in the kitchen while trying to pour himself a glass of water, and they were all too scared not to abide when Kyungsoo made them clean up the mess together and immediately go to bed.

Or how during their week in Osaka they wouldn’t stop trying to push Sehun and Jongdae together, literally, and even Minseok joined in at the end, probably out of some sick sense of sadism as he attempted to trip Jongdae into Sehun’s arms right in front of everyone in the middle of a concert. Not that he succeeded, of course. Jongdae had just stepped over his maliciously outstretched leg with an unwavering smile. 

The point is– it’s getting really old.

“Hyung,” Sehun says seriously one night, when they’re back at the hotel after their final concert in Nagoya. Being the amazing love gurus that they are, the other members had naturally paired off as soon as they checked in, leaving Sehun and Jongdae to be roommates. “We need to do something about this.”

“About what?” Jongdae says, as he walks out of the bathroom. Steam billows out from the narrow doorway behind him. He’s wearing a hotel bathrobe, tied just loosely enough that Sehun can see a sliver of pale chest, and the droplet of water that clings persistently to a sharp collarbone.

There’s an awkward moment where Sehun just sort of stares as Jongdae makes his way across the room to grab a bottle of water, “Sehunnie?” He prompts.

Sehun shakes himself out of it, “There’s no way you haven’t noticed,” he says, clearing his throat. “They’re trying to–to set us up, or something.”

“Oh,” Jongdae replies, “You mean how Baekhyun’s been giving himself an aneurysm trying to find nice things to say about you in front of me?” The smile in his voice is audible, “The other day he called you ‘hottest maknae,’ and I think he legitimately broke something.”

“Pfft,” Sehun says, nonchalant, even though that’s actually really embarrassing and Baekhyun is a fucking horrible wingman, “I _am_ the hottest maknae.”

Jongdae laughs, and takes a drink of water. His Adam’s apple bobs as he swallows, “So what exactly do you want to ‘do about it?’”

Sehun forces himself to flop onto his back on the bed so he will stop staring at the pale (and totally bitable) skin of Jongdae’s neck like a creep, “I don’t know, but they’re really getting on my nerves,” he says, “And they’re obviously not going to stop just because we ask them nicely.”

Jongdae clicks his tongue, plopping down next to Sehun even though there is another perfectly good, not to mention empty bed right next to them, “You’re assuming that there’s a ‘we’ in this situation at all, and not just a ‘you.’”

“Hyung,” Sehun whines, and rolls over so they can face each other– which turns out to be a huge mistake, because the sash around Jongdae’s waist has loosened even further, the left half of the robe threatening to slip off completely.

Through his suddenly dry mouth, Sehun manages to say, “I’m serious. They’re so bad at this that it’s actually embarrassing.”

Jongdae laughs again, and falls onto his back, which bunches up the fabric near his chest. Sehun really wants to reach out and tug it back in place, but he also really doesn’t.

“Yeah, I’ll give you that,” Jongdae says, “But I bet if we just acted like it didn’t bother us, they would lose interest soon enough and leave us alone.”

Sehun makes a noise at the back of his throat. “Do you really think that’ll work?”

“Just think about it like this,” Jongdae replies easily, “There’s a 99-percent chance that Baekhyun is their ring leader, right, and he has the attention span of a rabid squirrel monkey. So if we don’t rise to the bait, it won’t be any fun for him, and he’ll just go find someone else to bother.”

Sehun hums thoughtfully. “Well, it makes sense when you put it like that,” he says after a moment, “Hyung, you’re so smart.”

Jongdae laughs. “Aww, Sehunnie, you flatter me too much,” he says, and Sehun almost blurts that that isn’t possible because he is literally perfect, but Jongdae continues, “First you fall off a chair after I make puppy eyes at you, now you’re calling me a genius. Careful, or I might get the wrong idea." 

Sehun splutters, then immediately flushes. “I didn’t call you a _genius_ , I just said you were smart! That’s not the same thing,” he squawks, “Not that it matters, though, because I’m taking it back!" 

“What, no, you can’t take it back,” Jongdae cries, sitting up in a flurry. His brows are furrowed in mock outrage, his hair still slightly wet from the shower, and he looks so, _so_ cute, “The ‘genius’ was _implied._ And don’t think I didn’t notice how you just conveniently ignored the falling off your chair part.”  

“Hyung, it’s been like thirty billion centuries since that happened,” Sehun whines, “Just let it go already.”  

“Never!” Jongdae sticks his tongue out childishly, “It’s already been immortalized by the twitterverse. Too late now.”  

Sehun pouts. He’s too flustered to come up with a better comeback than, “I hate you.”

Jongdae widens his eyes at him, “How could you say that to your hyung,” he says, one hand coming up dramatically to rest where his heart is. “Especially one that loves you as much as I do.”

Sehun just rolls his eyes, and hopes his blush isn’t too obvious. He ignores the quickening of his pulse and squashes down mercilessly on the spring of hope flaring up in his chest, “Fine, whatever,” he says, “I love you too.”

He relishes in the blinding smile he gets in reply, and grunts when Jongdae collapses on top of him, whining that he wants to watch a movie.

Sehun sighs and smiles to himself, cuing up Tangled on his laptop because Disney is always their go-to, pushing all thoughts of whether or not Jongdae will ever take him seriously when he says ‘I love you’ to the back of his mind.

  

*

 

Jongdae’s solution had sounded easy on paper, but Sehun finds himself simultaneously flushing with embarrassment and gritting his teeth when coming face to face with the issue the very next morning.

It isn’t just ignoring the catcalls and tasteless jokes when him and Jongdae arrive at breakfast together (even though they’re _roommates,_ so why _wouldn’t_ they?), or forcing himself not to react at the obnoxious kissing noises Chanyeol and Baekhyun make whenever he so much as stands next to Jongdae, but it’s _this._

 _This,_ meaning Jongin’s wide-eyed and apologetic look that is so fake he may as well have ‘Made in China’ stamped on his forehead as he blinks innocently up at them from his seat in the car.

“I’m so sorry, my leg has been acting up lately and I need to ice it,” he simpers, gesturing to his leg that is splayed out on the seat next to him obtrusively. Sehun would feel bad for him, but he knows this is a blatant lie because he had literally just seen Jongin doing the Monster choreo to impress the stewardess at the restaurant earlier this morning, “There aren’t any spare seats,” Jongin continues, smiling disarmingly, “Two of you guys will have to share.”

Sehun grits his teeth. “Can’t you just ice your leg in front of you? There’s plenty of room.”

“I have to keep it fully extended,” Jongin sniffs, “And I can’t do that if I sit normally. My legs are too long.”

It’s complete bullshit, and he knows it. Everybody knows it. Unfortunately, Jongdae is too nice to say anything about it to his “injured” dongsaeng.

“It’s okay,” Jongdae says brightly. And of course him and Sehun are the only ones left standing. All the other members had already snuck onto the car in the meantime, “Sehunnie and I can share, right?”

Before Sehun can say anything, Baekhyun interrupts loudly, “Jongdae, you can sit on Sehun’s lap!” Accompanied by an eyebrow waggle.

Sehun’s eye twitches. He wants to tell Baekhyun to fuck off, like usual, but last night’s conversation rings in his mind. _Just act like it doesn’t bother you and don’t give them the satisfaction,_ he thinks, taking a deep breath. _Okay, that can’t be too hard._ He meets Jongdae’s eyes, who just smiles and shrugs.

So Sehun feigns nonchalance and shrugs back, “Sure,” he says, mildly, despite the nerves bubbling in his chest, and he is for once glad to have a naturally expressionless face. He ignores Baekhyun’s look of confusion at his easy agreement and sits down on the lone remaining seat.

He isn’t sure what compels him to do what he does next, maybe he is just taking the ‘act like it doesn’t bother you’ a step further, but Sehun leans back in his seat and spread his legs a little wider. He pats his thigh invitationally and smirks when he meets Jongdae’s eyes, who looks surprised but also vaguely approving.

He feels a bit like a circus animal as Jongdae steps forward to plop down on his lap, and the other members just kind of…stare.

Jongdae pats his hand, _ignore them,_ he seems to be trying to communicate with his eyes, and Sehun squeezes his hand back as he wraps his arms around Jongdae’s waist. Baekhyun burns holes into their still interlaced hands with his eyes from the backseat, and Sehun suppresses a sneer.

He had been kind of nervous about having Jongdae in his lap, because, well, what if he accidentally gets a boner? Not that that’s completely out of question or anything, because Sehun _is_ a healthy, hot-blooded (not to mention sexually frustrated) young man in his prime, but he finds himself more distracted by other things once the car rumbles to a start.

Other things, like how good Jongdae smells.

He’s usually too short for Sehun to be able to comfortably bury his face in his neck, but like this, with the added height boost, all Sehun has to do is pull Jongdae a little bit closer and lean forward.

“What are you doing?” Jongdae giggles when he feels Sehun’s breath against his neck.

“Hyung, you smell really good,” Sehun says in lieu of an answer. Out of context, that could sound pretty creepy (scratch that, it already does).

“It’s just the hotel shower gel,” Jongdae laughs, though he doesn’t seem all that bothered by Sehun’s nosing around his nape, and just shifts to get more comfortable.

“No, it’s something different,” Sehun insists, and inhales deeply again. “You smell kind of…citrusy.”

“Oh,” Jongdae says, “That must be my lotion, then! It’s orange-scented,” he twists to face Sehun, “A Chinese fan gave it to me back in April. Did you know that my nickname in China means ‘orange?’ Since my stage name is Chen, which sounds like the Mandarin word for orange, ‘cheng-zi.’ Our fans are so cute!”  

Sehun freezes from the proximity of their faces; he can feel Jongdae’s hot breath fanning against his cheek as he talks animatedly. Does he even realize how close together they are right now?

Sehun somehow manages to tear his gaze away from Jongdae’s literally sparkling eyes and leans back in to graze Jongdae’s throat with the tip of his nose, “It smells really nice,” he murmurs against the skin, “It suits you.”

He can acutely feel the rumble of Jongdae’s body when he laughs, “Noted.”

There are a few moments of blessed, peaceful silence, and Sehun even closes his eyes for a bit (Jongdae’s sweater is like, really soft), but then, as always, Baekhyun ruins it by exploding spectacularly.

“Is nobody going to say anything?? Really???” His voice comes out in a heady rush, too loud in the small space of the minivan, “This is disgusting! Nauseating! Revolting! Sickening! Cavity-inducing in a bad way! Why are we being subject to this??”

Sehun tips his head back onto the seat, and rolls his eyes so hard it actually kind of hurts. “Hyung, you’re the one who suggested Jongdae hyung sit on my lap in the first place,” he says, “I guess this is just karma." 

“You fucking– this wasn’t supposed to happen!” Baekhyun splutters accusingly, “You were supposed to blush like the loser virgin that you are and, like, stutter awkwardly or something and refuse to look at each other– not _this!”_ He gestures messily at the sight of Jongdae leaning comfortably into Sehun’s embrace, “You’re basically _cuddling!”_  

“Baek, I think you’ve been reading too many shoujo mangas. And not the good kind, either,” Jongdae says, turning his head to look at Baekhyun. “Also, what’s wrong with cuddling?”

Baekhyun makes an indignant noise, “Nothing’s wrong with cuddling, it’s great, actually, but you and _Sehun_ cuddling, on the other hand, is gross.” He explains seriously, like what is coming out of his mouth actually makes any sense.

Sehun scowls, “Can you not say my name like it’s an insult?” And then, more importantly, “And I am _not_ a virgin!”

Baekhyun sneers at him. “Then stop acting like one.”

Jongdae tsks, “Come on, Baek, that’s a little mean,” he says, and Sehun makes a face at Baekhyun from behind Jongdae, “What would the fangirls say if they saw you treating their favorite visual like this?”

Baekhyun scrunches up his face, "Probably–"

“Um, excuse me,” Jongin interrupts from beside them, before Baekhyun can get the rest of his scathing reply out. “I know it’s just a figure of speech, but like, _I’m_ obviously the actual favorite visual.”  

Baekhyun huffs a breath out through his nose, "That's not the point here–"

“What!?” Chanyeol is the one to exclaim loudly, “Are you kidding me? You are _so_ not.” He twists in his seat to address all of them, “If it were anyone, it would be _me.”_

There is a beat of silence. And then Kyungsoo clears his throat noisily. “I usually don’t like to risk being infected by your guys’ idiocy, but I have to say you’re all wrong,” he says seriously. “It’s clearly Minseok hyung.”

Minseok beams from the front seat and opens his mouth, but Joonmyun cuts him off before he can say anything.

“Okay, not to toot my own horn or anything,” Joonmyun says, straightening his collar, “But there’s a reason why plastic surgeons say this face,” Joonmyun gestures at his own face, “Has the golden proportion.”

“What, that means nothing!” Baekhyun replies heatedly, “Being the favorite visual isn’t about facial ratios and proportions or whatever, it’s about _charisma._ And I think we all know who the most charismatic out of all of us is.” He pauses meaningfully, and then–

“Me!” Five voices say at once.

Baekhyun, Chanyeol, Jongin, Joonmyun, and– surprisingly –Kyungsoo stare at each other for a moment, stony-faced.

Baekhyun narrows his eyes dangerously, and repeats, slowly, “ _Me.”_

There is a moment of stilted silence, before all hell promptly breaks loose, and a whole new round of arguing is being set off.  

Sehun, still vaguely dumbfounded at the abrupt turn of events, only manages to shake himself out of it when Jongdae looks at him amidst the chaos, amused, and mutters, “They’re so predictable.”

Sehun is confused for a second, before he realizes that Jongdae had somehow managed to seamlessly steer the subject away from Sehun’s lack of virginity, a conversation that just about reeked of disaster.

So he steadfastly ignores Chanyeol’s wail of “At least I’m not so short I can shop at GAP Kids!” in the background, and pulls Jongdae in closer by the waist.

“Thanks, hyung.” He says quietly into the space between them. 

Somehow, he doesn’t even have to look to know that Jongdae is smiling when he replies, “Anytime, Sehunnie.”

  

*

  

Ideally, Sehun would already be at least three quarters through with his plan to get Jongdae to fall madly in love with him so they can make out everywhere and piss Baekhyun’s grumpy, single, flat ass off on the regular. Ideally. 

However, Sehun exists in reality, and he hasn’t really been making great headway in this particular endeavor. If he’s being completely honest, though, he’s actually pretty okay with the way things are right now– Bubble Tea Tuesdays with Jongdae after practice have become a regular thing, they’ve started slowly working their way through a Harry Potter marathon (the longer the series, the more time they get to spend together), and Sehun is lucky enough to get to see Jongdae’s beautiful smile firsthand every day.

They always flirt onstage during concerts, too, just small fanservice things like holding hands and back-hugging, but it’s enough to send Sehun’s heart into overdrive every time.

And Jongdae was right– after they stopped paying the other members attention, they had slowly backed off with the whole matchmaking business, though more often than not Sehun still finds himself rooming with Jongdae whenever they travel. Not that he’s complaining.

But, as the saying of unknown origin slash what Sehun definitely heard Chanyeol say tearfully to his last Tim Tam last week goes– all good things must come to an end.

He isn’t stupid; he’s always known in a sort of peripheral way that one day he would have to come clean with his feelings and probably face crushing rejection, but he never thought that day would come so soon. Like, _today_ soon.

Just to set the scene: it’s probably nearing midnight by now, and Sehun and Jongdae are facing each other uncomfortably in the dimly lit stairwell of the restaurant everybody had gone out to to celebrate the end of their Japan tour. Sehun is a little bit tipsy from the shots Baekhyun had shoved at him earlier, which is the only reason he is the one to finally break the awkward silence.

“This isn’t really how I pictured this happening.” He says. He winces when the words echo, too loud, through the otherwise silent and empty stairwell.

Jongdae cracks a smile at that, “And how exactly did you picture it?”

Sehun shifts awkwardly, “First off, it would probably be brighter. And it wouldn’t smell like mildew everywhere.”

Jongdae leans gingerly against the wall behind him. Even in the weak lighting, Sehun can make out the faintest of blushes on his extremely well-sculpted cheekbones. He must be a bit drunk, too.

“I mean, yeah, this isn’t the greatest of circumstances,” he chuckles, before his expression sobers a little and he adds, a touch hesitant, “Was, uh, what Jongin said true?”

Sehun stifles a grimace at the reminder of Jongin’s spectacular display of moron-ness earlier. Namely, when he had plopped his dumb ass down on the seat next to Sehun’s and thrown an arm around his neck, laughing uproariously at something, more than loud enough for the entire room to hear, and said, amazingly coherent for someone so fucking drunk:

“Sehunnie!!!! Remember a few months ago when you were crying to me in the waiting room about how pretty Jongdae hyung is? REMEMBER?? And then you just would not shut up about it for the _LONGEST_ time? AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA–”

Sehun still fails to see how any part of that is even remotely funny, let alone enough to provoke such an energetic round of laughter. And it was just his luck that Jongdae was one of the few remaining people in the room sober enough to understand Jongin.

He had tapped Sehun (who was struggling to type ‘how to kill your best friend but not like actually kill him but also like _kill him’_ into the Google search bar on his phone) on the shoulder a few minutes later with the dreaded, “Can we talk?”

And really, what could Sehun have done except for swallow heavily with a shaky “Sure?” At least he knew the universe wasn't completely full of evil and despair when everybody else was too shit-faced to notice them slipping out of the room together; God knows what disgusting jokes and comments they would’ve made at that.

Anyways, back to the present– Jongdae is asking him whether or not Jongin had been telling the truth. The answer is yes. Obviously. Sehun honestly has no problem admitting to Jongdae that he thinks he’s pretty, because he is. He’s _so_ goddamn pretty, probably the most beautiful person Sehun has ever seen. Inside and out.

God, alcohol really makes his internal monologue so weepy sometimes.

The problem here isn’t that Sehun is too shy to tell Jongdae he’s pretty, but rather the _way_ that he’s telling him. Because, fuck, Sehun can think of very little things that would be more embarrassing than Jongin drunkenly blurting it out in the crudest and least romantic way possible to an entire room full of people.

He had always figured that when he finally got around to it, it would at least be bright enough so they could see each other properly.

But it’s not like Sehun can go back in time and change anything. This is definitely not how he imagined his grand confession to Jongdae would be like– in the back of some dingy stairwell while they’re both a little too drunk, aka the epitome of un-romantic-ness –but he supposes that like Bear Grylls, he has to improvise. Adapt. Overcome.

So he takes a deep breath instead, and forces himself to meet Jongdae’s eyes squarely. _Go big or go home,_ he tells himself.

“Hyung,” he says, stepping forward until he’s at the edge of Jongdae’s personal bubble. He leans forward to show how serious he is, secretly pleased by the way Jongdae swallows and has to tip his head back to maintain eye contact. Sehun doesn’t know how Jongdae’s eyes manage to shine like that even in this shitty lighting but they do, his hair is a little messy, and the top few buttons of his dress shirt are hastily opened– he’s fucking beautiful.

“I’m in love with you.” 

Jongdae’s eyes widen, almost comically, clearly not expecting Sehun’s answer. He opens his mouth, but Sehun, in a desperate attempt to delay the inevitable rejection, keeps talking.

“At first I just thought you had pretty eyelashes,” he smiles to himself, “And you do. I stared at you so much because of your eyelashes. But the more I stared, the more I started to see all these other amazing things about you. Everybody calls Chanyeol hyung the happy virus, or Baekhyun hyung the mood maker, but you’re the one that keeps us all going behind it all, you know? You’re always there to encourage us even when we mess up and make us feel better after a bad day. I always feel safe and warm when I’m with you, like I won’t be judged no matter what I say, and that’s an amazing feeling. I’m sure the other members would agree. And I don’t know exactly when it happened, but somewhere along the way I realized that I just want to be with you all the time, I want to make you smile and laugh so hard that you cry, I want to make you happy. So, hyung,” Sehun finally pauses to catch his breath, “I’m in love with you.”

He doesn’t take his eyes off of Jongdae’s face for the entirety of his mini speech, and greedily drinks in every detail of his expression. Shock, wonderment, and some other indecipherable emotion.

There are a few moments of silence as Jongdae clearly attempts to comprehend the word vomit that had erupted from Sehun’s mouth, but Sehun just waits patiently, if not a little anxiously.

“Sehunnie,” Jongdae finally says, and Sehun immediately straightens up, heart suddenly attempting to beat its way straight out of his chest. This is what everything has been building up to, and even though Sehun had tried to beat it into his brain that he shouldn’t expect too much, he still feels the smallest twinge of hope unfurling in his chest.

“I–you–I don’t–” Jongdae fumbles with his words a few times, and puffs his cheeks out adorably in frustration, but after a moment he finally manages to get a coherent sentence out. 

“I love you too!”

A beat.

And then– it’s Sehun’s turn to widen his eyes. He pinches himself just to make sure he isn’t dreaming– if he is he might actually cry– and _ow,_ yep, definitely real life.

A swell of happiness wells up in his chest at the revelation, so overwhelming in its intensity that he nearly doesn’t hear what Jongdae says next, “I mean, I thought I was being pretty obvious, actually, but you never made a move!” Jongdae complains. He shakes his head to himself a little, disbelieving, “And I can’t believe you’re telling me that you feel safe with me, that’s what I should be saying to _you._ I don’t know how to explain it, but being with you feels…it feels so warm. Like nothing could possibly hurt me.” He says.

The corners of his lips have curled up into a smile that can only be described as _soft._ Sehun is sure he has a matching grin on his own face that is just as, if not even dopier and more love-sick.

“Wait,” Jongdae says, “That actually might just be because you’re tall. And you give good hugs. Well, Chanyeol’s tall, too, but hugging him feels like I’m hugging a scarecrow, it kind of freaks me out. Oh, and Jongin, but he’s _way_ too muscle-y. Way.” He smiles innocently up at Sehun.

Sehun scoffs, playing along, “Wow, you just love me for my hugs, not who I really am,” he says, “And Jongin is _not_ more swol than I am! I’m muscle-y too!”

Jongdae’s laugh is like music to his ears. There are too many endorphins in Sehun’s system right now; he feels like he’s about to burst with happiness, and he can’t stop himself from stepping even closer to press Jongdae up against the wall.

He cages in the other’s smaller frame with one arm on the wall beside his head, the other hand settling on Jongdae’s waist, and leans forward to bury his face in Jongdae’s hair.

“Hyung,” he says, inhaling the scent of shampoo and oranges and _Jongdae._ His voice echoes again, but this time more softly.

Jongdae’s response of “Hm?” is lost somewhere in the muted noise of a raucous fit of laughter from a group of customers nearby, so loud that it seeps into the stairwell.

Sehun waits until their voices die down to say, a little muffled but no less meaningfully, “I love you.”

He can feel it with his whole body when Jongdae sighs contentedly. His arms come up to wrap around Sehun’s shoulders, “I love you too.”

There are several moments of peaceful, comfortable silence. Sehun resists the urge to pinch himself again, and instead smooths a hand down Jongdae’s side, just to make sure that he’s really _there_ and Sehun isn’t caught in some fantasy his pathetic brain conjured up.

And Jongdae really is there. He’s solid and warm against Sehun’s front, and he presses even closer so that they’re basically just hugging.

He’s real. This is real.

Sehun smiles against Jongdae’s hair. His heart has never felt this full, and he wonders if it’s possible to feel bloated with happiness, because he does.

Still, after a few more minutes pass, Sehun has started to sober up a little just from standing around and cuddling against the wall for so long, and that reminds him of something extremely important–

He pulls back marginally, and smiles sweetly down at Jongdae. “Want to help me go murder Jongin?”

 

*

 

Three weeks later, and they still haven’t put a label on it.

Objectively, not much has changed in their relationship; they still cuddle and binge movies unhealthily late into the night and sneak out on midnight convenience store runs, it’s just that now there’s a lot more making out and, on one special occasion that Sehun will never forget for the rest of his life, a ‘good morning’ blowjob.

Nevertheless, technically they’re still just ‘friends,’ and Sehun is determined to change that. 

The first opportunity comes soon enough. They’re sitting in– get this – _another_ stairwell, this one considerably more well-lit but just as empty, at the back of the M Countdown center. They just finished their first music core stage of this comeback, and the adrenaline still coursing through his veins is what gives Sehun the courage to lean in and capture Jongdae’s mouth in a kiss.

Jongdae makes a muffled noise of surprise, but quickly melts into it. The kiss gradually becomes more heated until Sehun has to force himself to break away. He’s still wearing the painted-on leather pants from the stage, which are really not the most comfortable to get hard in.

He leans back a little as he attempts to catch his breath, which turns out to be a completely futile effort, because when he looks back at Jongdae the sight pretty much takes his breath away– Jongdae’s face is flushed and his mouth looks red and bruised, his hair in disarray from Sehun’s hands running through it, his chest still heaving from the lack of oxygen.

His clothes are rumpled and mussed up from moving around, shirt unbuttoned just low enough to show a hint of collarbone. He looks completely fucked-out. 

It’s this train of thought that makes Sehun blurt, for the billionth time, probably, “Hyung, you’re so pretty.”

Never one to pass up an opportunity to embarrass Sehun, Jongdae nods slowly, “Mm, yeah, I remember what Jongin said that night,” Sehun can't help but cringe, while Jongdae just smirks at him.

“By the way,” he continues nonchalantly, “I just wanted to tell you that your eyelash fixation was pretty obvious from the start, actually.”

Sehun flushes. “Hyung…”

Jongdae ignores him, and dips his head so he can look at Sehun through his lashes. They’re even darker and thicker than usual today, he must have mascara on, which is just, fuck _,_ “I’ve always wondered,” Jongdae says, and smiles coyly up at Sehun, “Have you ever pictured me on my knees, with your cum all over my face, dripping from my lashes?" 

And– well, the answer is no, this specific scenario has not showed up in any of Sehun’s past R-rated fantasies involving Jongdae, but now that the idea’s out in the open…

As if on cue, his brain immediately conjures up images of exactly that, and oh. _Oh._

There goes the ‘don’t get hard in these pants’ plan.

“Hmm,” Sehun breathes, narrowing his eyes at Jongdae, “Hyung, are you trying to tell me something?”

Jongdae hums, smiling meaningfully. “Maybe.”

Sehun leans forward until he can speak into Jongdae’s ear, voice coming out lower and gruffer than usual. “Don’t tempt me.”

Unfortunately, the moment is broken almost immediately by Joonmyun yelling at them to hurry up from the doorway, rapping on the door three emphatic times. But maybe that’s a good thing, because Sehun’s boner immediately wilts at the sound of Joonmyun’s shrill voice.

“Coming!” Sehun calls out, sighing and standing up, holding his hand out to help Jongdae up. As they walk towards the dressing room together, hands still swinging between them, Sehun can’t help but think about what a failure that attempt had been.

They were closer to getting it on right there in the stairwell than anything, but what Sehun really wants is to get it on with Jongdae’s _heart._ Not the greatest metaphor, but what’s important is that he promises himself he’ll try again soon.

And try again he does.

This time they’re in the dorm kitchen on a precious day off, and they’ve got the entire place to themselves (Sehun may have pulled a couple strings here and there to get the others out of the dorm for the day…by which he means he’s doing the dishes for the next four weeks).

Sehun is no Gordon Ramsay, but he makes a mean cheese omelette if he does say so himself, and he ushers Jongdae into a seat at the counter as he puts on an apron and steps up to the stove.

The first step is to beat the eggs in a bowl. It’s simple enough, but Sehun is a little nervous– he’s isn’t cooking for just anyone, he’s cooking for _Jongdae_. And that is probably why when he tries to crack the first egg, he uses maybe just a bit too much force, and the shell breaks into about a million little pieces, all over the yolk. 

Jongdae giggles, “You need some help?”

“No!” Sehun replies, a bit frantically. He points an egg white-covered finger at Jongdae, “Stay right there! I got this.” Jongdae laughs again, probably at how ridiculous Sehun looks, but he stays put in his seat.

Fortunately, the next egg goes a lot more smoothly, and soon Sehun is turning on the stove and pouring the mixture onto a frying pan.

He briefly considers spelling out ‘DATE ME?’ with pieces of egg, but discards the idea just as quickly. He probably doesn’t have the expertise or technique for it, anyway.

Sehun turns off the fire when the omelette starts browning slightly at the edges, and slides it onto a plate. When he turns, Jongdae is looking at him, head propped up by one elbow against the counter and lips curled up at the corners. “Thanks,” he says quietly as Sehun sets the plate down in front of him.

Jongdae is really adorable when he eats– well, he’s always adorable, but especially when he eats. He doesn’t take his eyes off the food, all his attention and focus utterly devoted to eating, and he periodically lets out these small noises of satisfaction as he shovels food into his mouth.

Of course, there’s also the sight of his pretty pink lips stretched around the fork, though Sehun quickly puts an end to the train of thought because he really shouldn’t be getting turned on from watching someone eat an omelette.

All in all, it’s kind of a perfect moment. There’s sunlight streaming in through the windows, not too dim but not too bright either, the dorm is peacefully and blessedly quiet other than the sound of eating, and Jongdae’s legs are pressed warmly against his underneath the counter.

He’ll never get a better chance, Sehun is sure of it. He waits until Jongdae stops eating, which is to say when his plate is completely empty, to say something.

Logically, Sehun knows there’s no need for worry, but that doesn’t stop his heartbeat from quickening as he reaches forward to take one of Jongdae’s hands in his own.

“Hyung,” he says, and Jongdae looks up at him in question. _Everything’s perfect,_ Sehun repeats to himself and takes a deep breath. Here he goes, “Do you want to d–”

“Jongdae! We need to talk about that OST you were going to do for Kyungsoo’s new drama–” Manager hyung says loudly as the door to the dormitory bursts open, though he freezes when he registers the intimacy of the scene before him.

His eyes noticeably linger on Sehun and Jongdae’s intertwined hands, and the way they’ve both leaned in unconsciously, only to spring apart at the abrupt sound of the door banging open.

After a moment of silence in which they all stare at each other awkwardly, Jongdae very naturally retracts his hand, smiling brightly at Manger hyung.

“Hyung," he says, "About that, I was actually thinking–”

Sehun tunes the rest of his sentence out, and looks down. He can’t help but scowl at the countertop. Everybody knows that Jongdae is a workaholic of the highest order; once he gets started on something work-related, good luck trying to get him to talk about anything else.

Case in point, Jongdae shoots Sehun an apologetic look as he stands, following Manager hyung into the living room so they can keep talking about boring adult stuff.

Sehun just stifles a sigh and pouts to himself. Another attempt, another failure.

Still, he refuses to give up.

The next time is also the final time, at which point Sehun starts to get a little desperate, and they’re at the dorms again. They’re alone, but only temporarily, since some of the members are going to come back soon from their individual schedules, while others are out getting take-out for dinner from the chicken store down the street.

Sehun doesn’t have a lot of time, but he’s determined to make it work: just keep it short and sweet.

In past attempts he always spent too long building up to it, but this time will be different. He’s just going to come out and say it.  

Sehun is on the couch, the TV in front of him blaring some variety show that mostly acts as white noise while he impatiently waits for Jongdae to finish showering. After a few minutes, Jongdae finally appears from the bathroom, still toweling his hair dry. Sehun checks the time on his phone as Jongdae plops down beside him; he has to move fast. 

As soon as Jongdae settles against the cushions, Sehun is clicking the TV off and turning so they can face each other. Sehun puts on his serious face. He doesn’t even have time to be nervous as he leans forward, “Hyung,” he says, “Will you be my bo–”

“HAHHAHA, did he really do that? That’s _hilarious_!” He is cut off by Baekhyun’s annoying laugh as the latter shoulders open the door.

Sehun is going to fucking kill him.

Chanyeol, Kyungsoo, and Jongin follow behind, carrying paper bags filled with food, and Sehun is going to kill them, too.

The smiles on their faces freeze, however, and they abruptly fall silent when they notice the two figures on the couch, specifically the distinctly murderous expression on Sehun’s face. 

And as for Sehun. He doesn’t think he’s every felt this frustrated in his life– why is everyone out to sabotage his relationship with Jongdae all of a sudden? Does the universe not want them to be together? There’s no other explanation.

 _Well_ , Sehun thinks bitterly, glaring at Baekhyun’s totally punchable face. _Fuck_ _the universe._

So, instead of the grand, or at the very least private affair that Sehun had planned this whole thing to be, the way he goes about it instead is this:

He bares his teeth at the members still frozen in the doorway, resisting the urge to pull his hair out or maybe pull _their_ hair out, “What the fuck does a guy need to do to get some goddamn privacy around here??”

He turns back to Jongdae, who looks faintly startled but also amused, “Hyung, will you be my fucking boyfriend or not???”

It’s…pretty tactless, when he really thinks about it. Actually, it’s _extremely_ tactless. It would’ve been nice, maybe, if he hadn’t added an expletive in the middle of the question.

Fortunately, instead of getting mad, Jongdae just bursts out laughing. “Ahahaha, Sehunnie that was so romantic,” he says between giggles, and then “I thought I already was, though.”

Sehun balks at that. “What? We never put a label on it,” a pause, “I would remember if we did!”

Jongdae’s mouth twists into an amused smile, “I mean, we already said ‘I love you’ to each other, I think it’s pretty strongly implied here that we’re dating.”

Sehun’s jaw drops, “How was _I_ supposed to know that?”

“I don’t know,” Jongdae says, “Common sense, maybe?”

Sehun ignores the quip. Well, his monumental proclamation turned out to be somewhat of a disaster, but at least Jongdae confirmed that they’re _together_ together.

“Fine, whatever,” Sehun says, “What’s important here is that we’re boyfriends, now.”

Jongdae gives him a look that clearly conveys the ‘you’re so fucking dumb,’ but he nonetheless shifts closer, until their thighs are touching.

“We have been,” he says under his breath, and then louder to Sehun, “Yep, we’re boyfriends, now.”

They grin at each other for a few sweet moments. Everything feels soft and sugary, like it always does when Sehun is with Jongdae.

That is, until the forgotten members finally decide to make their presence known again.

“Wow, Sehun,” Baekhyun says, slowly. He sounds genuinely amazed, “That was literally the lamest thing I’ve ever seen.”

And the moment is broken just like that.

Chanyeol starts ‘ba-ha-ha’-ing, Jongin starts ‘tee-hee-hee’-ing, and Kyungsoo gives Sehun possibly the most judgmental stare known to mankind. Sehun just sticks his tongue out at them, and pulls Jongdae in closer.

Joonmyun and Minseok arrive a bit later, and Baekhyun makes it a point to inform them of the process of Sehun’s confession in a very detailed, albeit exaggerated manner.

Dinner soon turns into a contest of who can make fun of Sehun the most, and even Jongdae makes a few jibes, but he doesn’t mind.

It’s much easier to tune out all the teasing, Sehun finds, when he feels so warm with happiness from the feeling of Jongdae right here in his arms.

**Author's Note:**

> hope you enjoyed! comments are appreciated :D


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